Hannah's Hissy Fit

Scottisher, Douglas McDougal stumbles into a quaint little Farmish town with a very long name and quickly finds out that all is not as normal as it may seem. After promptly falling for the town's kindergarten teacher, Hannah (also aptly named the weary widow because of the rubber tires on her bike) he is quickly informed that she doesn't suffer Englischers gladly. Prohibited cellphones are conspicuous in their absence, the women-folk all suffer from Nippolvinger, the men hate their beards and chess is much more than just a silly board game. Staeger Papp, the notorious he-male is brought to trial for dyeing Clara Phindeldonderfrey's pigeon pink and amidst all this, the jilted Kauffman does all he can to keep Douglas and Hannah apart. 'Tis a story f'sure. Ya ken?