Loud Thoughts

Let Me have A Say
My body struggle to control the cage holding together the raging thoughts in my head.
They taunt me, yell at me, degrade me, betray me.
But still I stand, feigning happiness, hoping I can simply be:
Happy,
Carefree,
Me.
But alas, I am only flesh and the war in my head takes a toll on my body
And even then, I say "don't worry"
I'll be...
And that's it.
I proceed to take forever and a day to say one phrase.
Sweating, stretching out and repeating syllabus,
Asking God to simply have a say.
And while I suffer and pray for a way.
My thoughts run deeper, wider
Slowly eating me away.