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The Black Book of JokesDo you enjoy hilarious jokes, comedy, and humor?This book contains a massive collection of anecdotes on any topic, including some of the funniest uncensored dirty jokes for adults and dark humor jokes. Who is this book for?This excellent book is in the right hands if you like reading funny jokes, telling funny jokes, or if you want to make a present for someone who loves humor and enjoys reading funny books. In addition, this will be an excellent choice if you want to make someone around you happier. Laughter is the best medicine... Why this book?We can guarantee that you will enjoy one of the best collections of awesome jokes on any topic you can think about.Here you can read some of the best Office, Black Humor, Sex, and Marriage humor, along with the funniest jokes about Animals, Blondes, Policemen, Doctors, Preachers, Teachers, Kids, Women, Men, Clowns, Gays, Doctors, Old People, White People, Black people, Green People, Yellow People, Aliens, Prisoners, Singers, Artists, Musicians, Bankers, Lawyers, Engineers, Plumbers, Secretaries, Lovers, Circus, Life and everything else.
This book follows two woman as they troll a dating site in search of "the one". Their experiences will leave you both horrified, and howling with laughter. It's sex and the city without the nice shoes. If you've ever been on a dating site, are thinking about joining one, or want to have a few laughs at the authors expense this book is for you. It's all true, raunchy, insane and hilarious.
Do you need quirky questions to start great conversations when you're on a date, or having a family discussion? Do you ever wonder about things like if animals can be psychotic, or if some ants are lazier than others, or why can't we use our own poop for fertilizer instead of horse manure? Or what about wondering if too much water, or coffee, or chocolate can actually kill you? This book contains 42 wacky questions covering science, trivia, pop culture, and health/wellness, with answers provided with a good dose of humour (humor, if you're American). It's a great jumping-off point for different and unconventional topics to talk about. Plus, I like the idea of making money if you buy the book, instead of trying to find the answers by yourself on the internet. Not as easy as it looks, so enjoy the book, and have some wonderful conversations!
For decades telemarketers around the globe have been sworn at in every language on the planet. If one were to dabber in a telemarketer's world by reading the exact same script 5000 times, getting hung up on a billion times the average man would go insane. Imagine the tables were turned and telemarketer's got their day of reckoning. Their revenge has no ethical, moral or legal limit because pay back is a BITCH!
This adult book is filled with funny jokes, tall tales, true stories, and cartoons. We start with jokes that are great to tell children. Then we grow into teen humor, until we hit full laugh with adult humor. In this book you will find some old favorites and learn lots of new jokes. Some are great for work meetings, others are for poker games or bars. There are jokes for all occasions. If you have ever been offended by an off color joke, don't read the chapter of jokes that my wife has forbidden me to ever tell again. (And maybe other parts too. The kids joke chapter is safe.) Laughter is good for you... So start taking better care of yourself, a friend, or a loved one. Laughter is good medicine. If you have trouble telling jokes I have also added a few tips on how to "play" the audience. Jokes are great icebreakers useful in all parts of our lives. Teachers, clergy, and salespeople can set the feeling in the room with the right joke. Table Of Contents 1. Jokes to tell to kids (Rated G) My intent with this section is to offer jokes adults can tell to children. I hope you enjoy watching them laugh. When telling jokes to kids it is best to oversell the punch line. Large gestures and big smiles let kids get into the moment. 2. Back talk jokes great for teens (PG13) When I was a kid, when TV was black and white, and kids would use one-upmanship to win power on the playground, the world was simpler. A little wit and fast talk ruled. The worst thing you could do was to demean someone's mother, so... a lot of effort was put into attacking someone's mother with style. 3. Jokes you should never tell children I do not believe in censorship except on a personal level. I don't want a government telling anybody what they can or cannot read. However, if locker room talk isn't funny to you, please stop reading now. If you have ever been offended please do not read any further. 4. Tall tales These are tall tall tales, but fun. 5. True stories It is often stated, "truth is stranger than fiction." This section proves that saying to be true. Most of these stories happened to me and my family. The rest happened to patients, friends or colleagues. I'll tell you which are which, but when it comes to patients, friends and colleagues I have changed the names to protect their ids, egos, and in some cases super egos. 6. Jokes my wife forbade me from telling again My bride of almost 25 years tends to have a good sense of humor. Most of the time she puts up with my jokes and antics. On a few occasions she has even participated with my practical jokes. On a rare occasion, when I tell a joke that she perceives as tawdry, she will call me by my complete first name, "Philip!" and indicate with a look of motherly distain how disappointed she is in my choices. I assume she expects me to refrain from telling the offending joke again. 7. In closing, my favorite jokes I am constantly asked what is my favorite joke. This is a tough question because it depends on my mood and the audience. Please don't judge me too harshly, but here are my favorite jokes. 8. Encore Cartoons A look inside the mind of a shrink.
The graphics in this book are not all originally done by me. Some of them are from bits and pieces of graphics I have seen on the Internet, but I have tried to be very meticulous in not using anything with a copy write ((c)), registered ((R)), or trademark ((TM)) attached to it.I have taken those items I have seen that are not under any legal ownership and used open-end software to put them together to make the final products. While some of the graphics may look like the original, we have taken lengthy measures to ensure they are third-party 'copies' of the originals and not under any legal ownership..This book is offered to you for two purposes: First of all, to lighten your mood so that you might have a better day, and second, to intentionally stir up thoughts about current topics to help us consider other viewpoints, as well as our own.
Les citations apocryphes que je vous présente sont des phrases ou des déclarations qui sont attribuées à une personne célèbre, mais pour lesquelles il n'y a aucune preuve ou source fiable de leur origine.
This is a book for those who seek fun in words and images that leave a good after-taste. A combination of humorous poems and cartoons by the same author, who loves making people laugh.
People in the Ozarks have long told humorous vignettes that make sense of triumph and tragedy, relay family and local history, and of course entertain. Benjamin G. Rader's memoir offers a loving portrait of the Ozarks of his youth, where his grandfather midwifed babies and his great uncle Jerry Rader laughed so hard at one of his own stories that he choked to death on a pork chop. As he reveals the Ozarks of the 1930s through 1950s, Rader dispels the myths of the region's people as isolated and sharing a single set of values and behaviors. He also takes readers inside the life of the extended Rader family and its neighborhoods, each of which drew on storytelling to strengthen resolve in lives roiled by change, economic depression, and the shift of daily life from the country to the city. An alluring blend of remembering and reflection, When Grandpa Delivered Babies and Other Ozarks Vignettes provides a vivid portrait of a fading time.
ESTA ES UNA NOVELA DE HUMOR NO APTA PARA: - PIJOS ACOMODADOS.- TIQUISMIQUIS VARIOS.- RIDÍCULOS REMILGADOS.- NI ROMANTICOIDES AL ESTILO TRADICIONAL.(Si considera que forma parte de alguno de estos penosos colectivos, ABSTÉNGASE DE LEERLA) Una COMEDIA FEROZMENTE DIVERTIDA y con un ESTILO ÚNICO en la literatura humorística. Sinopsis: Bartual, a raíz de una situación de quiebra vital que lo tiene sumido en un estado casi depresivo, descubrirá el fascinante y alocado mundo que envuelve la Bodega Valero. Allí, junto a Bárbara y un grupo de entrañables e insensatos personajes, iniciará un desternillante viaje de enriquecimiento personal.ALGUNAS RESEÑAS DE LECTORES: - Por Marc. L. Me ha recordado mucho al humor de Eduardo Mendoza. ¡Genial!. Una comedia ferozmente divertida. - Por María P. Novela de Humor y Aventuras. Maravillosa. RISAS GARANTIZADAS. De lectura fluida, fácil, amena y divertida. Una novela que te engancha de principio a fin. Un soplo de aire fresco. - Por AFM. FÁCIL DE LEER. Un libro divertidísimo y muy ameno. Personajes, situaciones, lenguaje... ¡Genial! - Por cliente Amazón. Muy divertido xD me recuerda al ritmo de Sharpe. En resumidas cuentas, un libro ameno, fácil de leer y sobre todo un antídoto contra el estrés y la ansiedad. Lo recomiendo sin fisuras para echarse unas buenas risas. - Por Isabel. S. Me ha gustado muchísimo por todo. Es divertida y en algunos casos se me han saltado las lágrimas de risa. - Por Xavier. W. Pues mira, deciros a todos que me ha encantado, la verdad... Ágil, con personajes bien construidos y entrañables y bastante divertida. Mucho para los estándares de novelas "de risa" que conozco de escritores españoles. Me la leí en tres días. ¡Recomendada!Ahora sí, le dejo con esta pandilla de locos entrañables y maravillosos que son los personajes de esta novela.Buen provecho / Bon profit.
Are you looking for a great gift for your Husband?This is an empty lined notebook / journal to write in. Makes a great gift. Perfect for taking notes, jotting lists, doodling, brainstorming, prayer and meditation journaling, writing in as a diary, or giving as a gift. Not too thick & not too thin, so it's a great size to throw in your car or bag! Details: Blank Lined Pages120 pages6 inches x 9 inchesSoft Matte CoverWhite paper
Seven unrelated tales for grown-ups played for laughs. "Love Drug Connections": Hunts for an aphrodisiac and a statue, both called Love Goddess, result in chases, lies, and comeuppances. "Funerals Are For Drama": Backers of an Indie film die suddenly and further funding depends on the actors' behavior at their funerals so the ambitious actors use several funerals for drama more than mourning. There are gag gifts placed in a casket; a missing arm; flowers delivered to the wrong funeral and stolen back; and rescuing valuable items from a cult group's funeral pyre. "Misunderstandings": Two people forced by circumstance to temporarily share an office and a phone each suspect the other is conducting an illegal business - then the detective arives. "The Store Angel": A man lingering in a store turns out to be more than he seemed when told to leave. "You Can't Go Home Again...": Progress takes an unexpected form in a small town. "An Interview With the Devil": Beelzebub enjoys a moment in the spotlight. "Check It Out": A computerized grocery checkout counter meets resistance from a customer.
★ Kleine Aufmerksamkeit für liebste Menschen★ Ein schönes Geschenk, mit dem man sich prima die Zeit vertreiben kann★ 184 brandneue Sudokus★ 3 Schwierigksstufen: leicht - mittelschwer - sehr schwer★ Das Rätselbuch ist kompakt und handlich - ein ideales Mitbringsel!
In her playfully witty debut, satirist Esther McBee lists the ways that she and her fellow liberal friends believe they should act... versus how they actually do. Live Liberally provides 101 tongue-in-cheek tips for how flawed left-wingers do - and don't - reduce their impact on the environment, promote equality, and raise a more woke generation. Whether you're a Bernie-loving progressive Democrat, a MAGA-hat-wearing conservative Republican, or anywhere in between, this quick read will have you simultaneously laughing and cringing at her sharp insights into liberal hypocrisy.
Are you looking for a great gift for your wife?This is an empty lined notebook / journal to write in. Makes a great gift. Perfect for taking notes, jotting lists, doodling, brainstorming, prayer and meditation journaling, writing in as a diary, or giving as a gift. Not too thick & not too thin, so it's a great size to throw in your car or bag! Details: Blank Lined Pages120 pages6 inches x 9 inchesSoft Matte CoverWhite paper
If you like fun with punsAnd prose with ghostsThen take a lookThis might be your kind of book Giving a voice to those in the afterlife, these quotes represent their complaints, praise and advice about what to expect when you're, well, dead. Do you ever wonder what your loved ones would say to, maybe, lift your spirits or give you some insight into their afterlife experience, if they had the chance? This compilation of quotes from beyond the grave, will allow you a glimpse of how they may be feeling after choosing the road death traveled. What's it like to be dead? Let them tell you in their own fun way because who says you have to be dead serious? These fun quotes will help to keep your head above ground, even in the worst of times. They may not be able to put the fun back in funeral, but maybe you'll die laughing from reading them - figuratively of course.
The Best Yo Mama JokesJam packed full of only the best laugh out loud funny yo mama jokes, this kid friendly book will have you in stitches. These yo mama so ugly jokes will have you laughing out loud. These yo mama jokes are jokes that you will laugh at until it hurts.We can confidently say this is the largest selection of yo mama ugly jokes ever assembled in one place. We hope you enjoy these yo mama so ugly gags - our collection of the very best jokes and puns. You're bound to laugh at them.Example jokes....Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.Yo mama so ugly even Hello Kitty said goodbye.Yo mama so ugly One Direction went the other direction.Yo mama so ugly even homeless people won't take her money. Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry. In thei huge collection of yo mama so ugly jokes, you will find many, many more funny Yo Mama jokes to keep you laughing until it hurts, so buy this kid friendly (no rude words) Yo Mama So Ugly joke book now.
Bought to the printed page on the back of the cult internet sensation and an immensely successful Crowdfunding campaign contributed to by many of the artists involved, ''Dear Mr. Kershaw'' is the result of 7 years' surreal and quite bonkers work. ''Derek'', with help from his friend ''Wilf'', is a retired gent who back in 2008 set out on a bizarre crusade, writing good old-fashioned letters to pop and rock stars regarding lyrical inaccuracies and ambiguities in their most famous songs and often hilariously getting the wrong end of the stick. The letters are eminently publishable in their own right, mixing sharp wit, confusion and biscuits with trips to the shops and unarguable logic in relation to questioning the offending chart hits under scrutiny. What makes this book an essential purchase however is that, with the missives online for all to see on what was becoming a hugely popular website, the artists quite unexpectedly started to reply. ''Dear Mr. Kershaw'' features over 65 of the best and funniest letters and responses from famous and legendary names spanning every reach of the pop, rock, metal, prog and punk spectrum, all relishing their involvement ''in character'' and revealing their own in many cases hitherto unknown humorous sides. Amongst those to be saluted for their great sportsmanship are Noddy Holder, Billy Bragg, Was Not Was, The Stereo MCs, Dave Stewart of The Eurythmics, Saxon, Tom Robinson, Stiff Little Fingers, Rick Wakeman, Paul Heaton, Squeeze, Toyah, Howard Jones, The Divine Comedy, Kim Wilde, and of course the gentleman himself Mr Nik Kershaw Also includes 100 ''mini-letters'' and Polymer Animal PopstarsHighly recommended to anyone who likes music and laughing
If you're a fan of fishing, or just love a good laugh, this collection of fishing jokes is perfect for you!The "100+3 Fishing Jokes" joke book covers everything from fish puns to fishing one-liners. Whether you're an experienced angler or just starting out, you'll find plenty of jokes to keep you entertained. Some of the jokes are classic and well-known, while others are more creative and original. You'll find jokes about different types of fish, fishing gear, and even fishing-related occupations. From silly wordplay to clever punchlines, there's something for everyone in this collection. Whether you're looking for a quick laugh or want to entertain your fishing buddies, these jokes are sure to reel in some smiles. So grab your fishing pole, kick back, and enjoy the humor that comes with the sport of fishing.
Beth Johanneck's humorous vignettes - sharing rural childhood memories with the benefit of modern insight - make for a delightful collection from a farm girl who grew up near the Minnesota home of Laura Ingalls Wilder.Julie Kramer - author of Stalking SusanWelcome to Seaforth, Minnesota, population 77. Meet Monica Fischer, a delightfully off-beat small town icon, whose early life was upended by tragedy, but whose antics have since brought raised eyebrows and smiles. Meet the Minnesota Country Mouse whose life Monica impacted in the best sort of way. Included in this collection of short stories and random thoughts is a collection of paintings by retired farmer and folk artist, Arnold Kramer, also known as Minnesota's Grandpa Moses, who shares family history with both of them.
A candidate who knows the angles yet speaks in circles, Paul Mellor gives his views on today's issues. In his book, Road to the White House, Mr. Mellor takes us into his town hall meetings tackling the tough questions from ordinary and not so ordinary Americans.Mr. Mellor draws from his experience. While his opponents may have served at the state level working in the House of Delegates, or at the national level working in the House of Representatives, Mr. Mellor has served in the international level, working in the House of Pancakes.He has received numerous honorary degrees. The latest being from Lakeside Elementary School.Mr. Mellor believes in education. He began reading at an early age by visiting Children's Book Stores, and today he's a frequent visitor at Adult Book Stores.Mr. Mellor has a passion for his country. In fact, he is the only one on his block who flies the American Flag. His neighbors on Prince Edward Island attest to this.America needs Paul Mellor, and Paul Mellor needs Americans to buy his book.
SOON TO BE A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE FROM 20TH CENTURY FOX Two reckless but lovable all-American bros make a strong case for maturing slowly through their outrageous yet enlightening misadventures across this great country of ours. My brother and I are looking for wedding dates for our cousin's wedding. We've been told by the bride that bringing dates is "mandatory" so we "won't harass all of my friends all night" and "stay under control." Rather than ask some fringe women in our lives to go and face the inevitable 'does this mean he wants to take it to the next level?!' questions, we'd rather bring complete strangers and just figure it out... We're both in our 20s, single, dashingly tall, Anglo-Saxon, respectfully athletic, love to party, completely house trained...love our mother, have seen Love Actually several times...raw, emotional, sensitive, but still bad boys....You should be attractive or our aunts will judge you, but not TOO attractive or one of our uncles might grope you. Dave and Mike Stangle thought nothing of it when they boozily decided to turn to the "activity partners" section of Craigslist to solicit dates to their cousin's wedding. The hilarious, out-of-this-world ad that they came up with--featuring a picture of the two brothers as centaurs--immediately went viral, eventually landing these Wayfarers-wearing, moped-riding, completely reckless but ultimately loveable bros in the annals of the "Internet famous." In Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates, the Stangle brothers bring their trademark, off-color humor to everything from their most embarrassing adolescent experiences (like getting beat up by a girl on their front lawn...in front of their dad), to the most outrageous predicaments (like tripping on mushrooms with their bulldog, Frank), to proper sexting etiquette, and finally to breaking up a midget bar fight (you have to shoo them away). With the incredible comedic chemistry of Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson in Wedding Crashers and the uncensored honesty of Tucker Max, Mike and Dave insist there's nothing wrong with just seeing where life takes you.