Birth Parent - Unseen, Unheard

Adoption and Foster care are are difficult topics to discuss, and there is a part of the adoption/foster care story that remains hidden and unspoken about for the most part - the story of the birth parent. This poetry collection expresses the grief of a birth parent, through the most harrowing experience of my life. "Post death wishes
I impose a time limit
I'll give it
One year from now
To see how
I'm living I decided
On the way home from the suicide centre
Dirty Thames to the left
Tired of deep wishing for courage to dive
That I
Had some right to a decent life
Despite
Having failed in the greatest endeavour
I might
Find something, never better
But maybe just enough to tether
Enough to delay the boat home And so
The pact was made
Internal, firm were scarred hands that shook
Seriously taken, was the promise of that day And lo
And behold
We are nearing
Month twelve
Have I found me a rope?
Will it tether or choke?"