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What's that sound? What was that flash of scales? Look! Up in the sky! It's a bat! It's a ghost! Oh, Great Goddess with green googly eyes, it's the Great Dragon, Molly Brown! It's time! It's time! The most glorious time of the year! Fall! Halloween! Samhain! And... drum roll, please... The Brown Family Pumpkin Patch Pick-A-Beauty and Win a Jack-O-Lantern for Life Party-stravaganza.This is gonna be the best ev... whoooooooa!What the heck just happened? What was that noise? Is there a perpetrator in my Pumpkin Patch? Was that the sound of a gourd smugglin' son of gun messin' with my babies?Oh, hell no! I am Molly Brown. Hear me roar. Ain't nobody gonna mess with my punkins.With Cleo on my shoulder and my trusty Wand back in the house, this Keeper of the Sacred Pumpkin is on the case. No way, no how is anyone gonna rain on my parade.But if it's who I think it is, he's seriously got some 'splainin' to do.
Has anybody seen my Dragon Man?Do you think he remembers me? It started with a hard-to-get-right cookie recipe.We moved on to my Familiar and her yearly shenanigans.Then, somehow, a flying stove got involved. Now, I'm seeing double, my Magic is on lockdown, and I just found out some green-skinned crazy man with mommy issues thinks I'm his Mate. All I can say is, Welcome to My World. Great Goddess in green go-go boots, this is why the good die young, isn't it?At this point, I'm ready to use all my lifelines and call my mom.Things cannot get any worse, right?
Did you know a Witch cannot ride her broom with a broken leg? Well, it's true. I have one. I should know. Christmas Eve is on the way. I'm the one and only Keeper of the Christmas Star, the Curator of the Crystal Forest, the one Witch in all the world with the ability to give the Christmas Star the special Brown Family whammy-abracadabra-hocus pocus to light the way for Santa's yearly sojourn...And I have a broken leg that just won't heal. As if things weren't bad enough, Edgar, my frumptastic-but-lovable Familiar, a rather cranky one-thousand-three-hundred-and-forty-seven-year-old Christmas Elf, swears I've been cursed.Can you imagine? Me? The fantasticness that is Ella Elizabeth Brown cursed? It's just not possible. But...There have been an inordinate number of spiders lurking about my little cottage in the woods.I have been a little more klutzy than usual.And my daily phone call with my cousin, Molly, was hijacked by the Dragon of my dreams. Could Edgar be right? This a mystery that must be solved.Time to pull out all the stops, whip up all the Magic, and swallow my pride.I need help, and it comes in a great big package with wings and gorgeous golden and red scales. Hold onto your stockings, my friends. This is one Holiday story you don't want to miss.
Talk about things not going as planned... Welcome to my world.All I wanted was to receive my One True Gift, find my Mate, and live happily ever after. Is that too much to ask? I think not. After all, it's my two-hundredth birthday, and there's not even one slice of cake on this blasted mountaintop.But as momma said, 'All the planning in the world can't beat dumb luck.'So, instead of a party and champagne, I got a trip to Hell without directions, a fight with a notorious, legendary pussycat who wanted to rule the world, and kitty scratches in places I didn't know existed.Being almost immortal isn't what it's cracked up to be. Trust me. I wouldn't lie to you.Now, I have to save not only Ollie - the most annoying Familiar in the world - from the maniacal mouser hellbent on world domination and her manic mishmash of misfits, but also the man, the Dragon, the Universe made for me. There is not enough coffee or chocolate in the world, but that doesn't matter.Sometimes a Witch has to do what a Witch has to do.It's time to shove my well-rounded booty in my yoga pants, straighten my messy bun and show the inhabitants of the UnhappilyNeverAfter what a Brown Family Witch is made of.So, buckle up, my Buttercups. My name's Davina Elizabeth Brown, and I'm gonna save the day.
I've got a Heart on for my Dragon, and nuthin' stops a Brown Witch - not even you! Valentine's Day went off without a hitch. Love was in the air. Arrows were flying. The chocolate-covered cherries were extra good, and...Drum roll, please...My hunka-hunka-burning love returned from parts unknown.Everything was wonderful. The world was in love. I was in love. Even Bernie smiled for half-a-secondAnd then it happened...Bibiddy-bobbity- blech-ack-gag-gag-gag!Whisked across the galaxy, thrown into a hole in the ground, and separated from my Dragon, my happily ever after was brutally rebuffed, and Goddess help us all, somebody touched my butt!This crap will not stand!Just let me get my Magic back, and I'll be opening a can of whoop ass and not even asking for initials or my name's not Violet E. Brown, Witch Extraordinaire and Keeper of the Spark of Love!Watch out, bad guys! Back up Spiorpion! My spellin' fingers are cocked, and Bernie's fit to be tied! We're coming to save my Dragon Man, jerk a knot in your tail, and send you back to the Hell from whence you came.Valentine's Day may be over, but the Love only stops when I say so. That's my gig. That's who I am. Amoré is what I do! Ya' hear me, Bad Guy?
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